I suppose this is where I ask for a partner in this crime of music. Someone that can actually piece together a tune for my pitiful poetry I pretentiously call lyrics.

But.. They aren’t so bad, eh?

I’m sitting around with about 9 hours of sleep in the last 48 hours of my life.
I have a class with a quiz in less than an hour. I half way read what I needed to.
Not that I need any of the classes I have taken in the past year. I already dropped 3 this semester. Which is half of the amount allowed to drop in TX (for undergrads).

Not that it matters. I’m going into beauty school.
To specialize in make up.
My dream is to receive the Oscar for Achievement in Make Up.

Are you laughing yet?

Apparently there is this huge fanbase out for the book Twilight. I had no idea.
This may be a bandwagon I’ll have to run and catch to jump on.

uughhh.. There is not enough Redbull in this county to revive my weak and frail system.

I’m also going to be hyped up on Redbull until this afternoon when I crash.

Good thing I decide to donate plasma Friday and not today.
Goodness the things I’ll do for some spare cash.

ohherecomesomemorelamelyrics

We call this limbo of ours comfortable
But sometimes I wonder if you’re thinking what I’m thinking
We designate these grounds as common
But sometimes I wonder if what you feel for me is sinking

There’s every reason why we can’t own up to it
There’s every reason why we should hide this
But wouldn’t it be nice, oh wouldn’t it be nice
To kiss and finally tell

Oh drummer you are strange indeed
Keeping these things locked with greed
Look me in the eye, say it quietly
Look me in the eye, let finally be

We sit back and do nothing about this
Textually active is the term I think they would say
We sit back and casually smile back
Do normal people really carry on this way

There’s every reason why we can’t own up to it
There’s every reason why we should hide this
But wouldn’t it be nice, oh wouldn’t it be nice
To kiss and tell

Oh drummer you are strange indeed
Keeping these things locked in greed
Look me in the eye, say it quietly
Look me in the eye, and finally let it be

Oh yes, I know there’s every reason why we can’t own up to what we are
And I know there’s every reason why we have to hide our hearts
But wouldn’t it be so nice
Wouldn’t it be the sugar to your spice
Wouldn’t it be so nice
To finally kiss and tell
To finally kiss and tell
To finally kiss and tell

So what is this? Just another blog I use online to divulge the crappy or happy moments of my life?
Or can I finally connect with the wisdom hopefully found somewhere in me?

Fuck.

Have you ever tried to fix something that you knew was irreversible? I mean, something that even Cronos himself would have trouble taking care of?
It’s a bitch, ain’t it?
And you keep trying. You know it’s pointless. You know your efforts are being wasted, and your spending energy basically trying to create a whole new universe.
But you can’t stop. You just bank that maybe this one time, a wish will come true. The time and space continuum will bend to you will and things will suddenly clear up!
Alas, that is not how life works.

And we are back to Fuck.

College is pointless if you know what you want to do with your life.
If you are nearly 100% certain what the hell you’re going to do with the rest of your remaining years on this planet, they should reward you with grad school. None of this 4 year bullshit taking classes you know you’ll never use. Wasting money you know you really need.
No wonder our economy is so bad. Everyone is still paying off their college loans.

I am a religious believer that music can fix or enhance any mood. If you’re mad, and want to be happy, pop in some Mika. If you’re mad and want to be aggressive, pop in some Black Sabbath.

I know that one day I will marry a comedian. Maybe not professional, but someone that embodies the witty, sarcastic, hilarity that I crave in life.
I think this is why I watch so much stand up. As if I am looking for what qualities I should pay attention for later on in life.
The only problem with that, is that I end up falling in love with the funniest men for a brief period of time as they rattle off joke after joke.
With that conclusion, I foresee a Vegas marriage.
And then an annulment.

Oh Fuck.

I’m wasting my time with everything here, I can’t believe you think that it’d be fine, It’d be clear, That we could wait and listen, Sweat not glisten, Try and put forth everything worth something, Everything worth nothing, You sit and you stare, You’ve got nothing to share, One day you’ll wonder why you never really cared, Why you never really compared, The facts of your life, The husband the wife, The sorrow the strife, Cut tensions with that knife, And now you listen to this, Lick your shut lips, Hold back that rank kiss, Mine’s a hit, Yours’ a miss, Now sit back in the bliss, And take hold of that moment, Take hold but don’t show it, Take hold but don’t know it, Sit back and enjoy it, Sit back, And, Let, Go.

Hey friend
Remember me?
I was your best
But now you see
You are a bitch
Dropping us three
You are a cunt
But now we’re free
now we’re free

We tried so hard just to make things right
For six months now we put up a fight
But no longer will we call you our friend
We’re going to be together without you ’til the end

You’re a hypocrite that we just can’t stand
I have no idea, I just can’t understand
How you let us go, how you easily gave up
Whatever, I’m over it, you’re forever cut

Hey ex-friend
Remember me?
You former best
And now you see
You are the bitch
Now suddenly
You’ll be all alone
For eternity
eternity.

Always looking towards the past, or is it looking back?
These thoughts keep creeping up in the worst moments
I don’t think I’ve ever missed you oh so much
Needing you her to guide me, I’ve lost my touch

Oh Father, can you hear me?
With these words I am screaming
Oh Father, can you hear me?
Save me from myself, save me.

I’ve forgotten the sounds of your voice, how it kills
No memory of “I love you”s, I’m taking pills
So numb to this world, I want to feel
Normal, normal, just to feel real

It’s been so long, and I’ve made so many mistakes
Without you here to see me through, It’s been so bad
I feel as if I have failed you, worst daughter award
I don’t want to fuck up anymore, help me move forward

Oh Father, can you hear me?
With these words I am screaming
Oh Father, can you hear me?
Save me from myself, save me.

I’ve forgotten the sounds of your voice, how it kills
No memory of “I love you”s, I’m taking pills
So numb to this world, I want to feel
Normal, normal, just to feel real

Oh Father, can you hear me?
With these words I am screaming
Oh Father, can you hear me?
Save me from myself, save me.

Oh Father, can you hear me?
With these words I am screaming
Oh Father, can you hear me?
Save me from myself, save me.

It’s not like I don’t know what I’m doing
You’re not the only one I’ve fallen for
This was written to tell you the truth
That you’ve shaken me to the core

But you’ve screwed it up royally
You’ve treated me second rate for too long
I’m your friend as well you know
You’ve been getting it oh so wrong

Friends with benefits is one entire thing
Ignoring the first is not kosher at all
Blowing me off for your selfish ways
Is what makes these things completely fall

Reconstruct your priorities for me please
Renew your life means tonight
Don’t leave me hanging like you always do
Please start and make things right

I hate to demand so much so abruptly
But it would be devastating falling for sure
If you can’t even treat me properly
Because this time I have no cure

This is all I ask
This is all I need
Please answer asap
Please take heed

My feelings are on my sleeve.